May
3
2008

A Letter For My Dear Wife

TO MY DEAR WIFE:

During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times.
I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten days.

The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often:
  • 54 times the sheets were clean
  • 17 times it was too late
  • 49 times you were too tired
  • 20 times it was too hot
  • 15 times you pretended to be sleep
  • 22 times you had a headache
  • 17 times you were afraid of waking the baby
  • 16 times you said you were too sore
  • 12 times it was the wrong time of the month
  • 19 times you had to get up early
  • 9 times you said weren’t in the mood
  • 7 times you were sunburned
  • 6 times you were watching the late show
  • 5 times you didn’t want to mess up your new hairdo
  • 3 times you said the neighbors would hear us
  • 9 times you said your mother would hear us

Of the 36 times I did succeed, the activity was not satisfactory because:

  • 6 times you just laid there
  • 8 times you reminded me there’s a crack in the ceiling
  • 4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with
  • 7 times I had to wake you and tell you I finished
  • 1 time I was afraid I had hurt you because I felt you move

See the wife’s response on the next post…


About the Author:

Praning5254 is an insomniac who started blogging since 2008. She is an educator and a Clinical Instructor offline, who has the passion for gadgets and other technology-related stuffs. Online, she maintains several blogs of various niches, which depicts her passion for technology, health, food, movies, books and other interesting stuffs.

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